GROW

Books at Saatchi Gallery

The way she moves, the way she laughs, what she knows....

What makes an older woman sexy? I fell asleep the other night wondering this, having contemplated the subtle erosion of the various bodily bits which supposedly evoke sexual urges.

But before I launch into my exegesis, I must make a minor (and defensive) detour and query the same about older men.  What do we find sexy about Jeremy Irons or Clint Eastwood?  Isn’t is their self-assurance?  Their ease?  Why is it considered that they look great when their hair turns silver and lines define their face, yet this doesn’t apply to women?  I know, this is a huge topic, and a bit of an old saw and frankly I’m really...

Who We Are in 2016 - in Living Color!
Tom Nolan on the Synchrony of R&B and Education

We don't know how many other R&B educators there are out there, but we suspect few.  Tom Nolan brings the energy and soul that he works with on stage to his role as Dean of Students at the Crossroads School in Los Angeles.  Tom Nolan is a perfect fit at a school that prizes creativity, and a few decades of students concur. 

Part I of our interview with Tom

A Light-hearted Documentary about an Outrageous Gathering in the Desert
From the shaggy front lines of hipster culture, we bring you a light-hearted documentary on BEquinox, a regional Burning Man event held in Joshua Tree, CA. Though smaller in scale, it has the same wild mix of people and shenanigans, and the same blissed-out vibe as Burning Man. More than a few Boomers.
How painter Joni Wehrli conquers acrophobia swinging high in the air

When I learned a good friend of a good friend of mine, who happens to be well over 50, had been flying on a trapeze, weekly, over the past decade, I knew I had to witness it and then show the good readers of Realize that things you never thought possible at our age can be done with agility and grace.  Joni Wehrli gives us a voyeuristic thrill and talks about how the art of flying influences the art of painting; for her it is not only a source of exhiliration but of inspiration for her work as well.

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Maybe it's Because He Knows How to Play... Watch the Video interview.

Yes, Larry really knows how to play, but more importantly, Larry really knows how to emote, and how to help you energize your ability to do so as well. This is at the core of his workshop, ‘Masters of Self-Expression.’  Does the name sound a bit outlandish, abstract? Yet Larry, together with the program’s founder, Dan Fauci, and their talented faculty, brings it down to earth. The workshop’s goal is to help us discover the path to a deeper, more meaningful expression of our true selves. Their methods range from highly entertaining to terrifying and are almost always exhilarating.

Or How I Learned to Talk Tree

There is a place we can go, when we allow our minds to go silent, a place full of delight and joy.  I have glimpsed it before, mostly walking in nature.  But in this case, residing for four days in the foothills of the Sierras, it comes to me in spades.  Because here, beneath cobalt blue skies and between bosomy hills draped in dry yellow grasses and peppered with pines and manzanitas, is where my Zen retreat is taking place.

I soon learn this state of joy can happen anywhere, even facing a blank white wall.  For there is an essential joy residing in our natures as well as in nature herself.  That joy is waiting patiently beneath...

Happy Hour Enlightenment in Berkeley California

A mathematician, an artist, a lawyer and an MBA walk into a bar…

You might think this is the start of a joke about null sets, oil paint, sharks and private equity, but it’s something completely different. It’s a salon, a real Salon, like the Algonquin Round Table in Manhattan, or Gertrude Stein’s Paris salon. These people meet every Friday night at the brightly-lit, well-appointed Solano Grill and Bar in a bustling Berkeley neighborhood, and they say it’s the highlight of their week.  And everyone has something to contribute -- from the theoretical to the personal, from the serious to the laughable, from the...

Pat Hitchens inquires amongst her peers about the value of the Bucket...

In an online chat venue, I encountered a post to the effect that Every rational person should have a Bucket list.  But after chatting up the subject with a number of Realizers, I’d modify that to something like, Every rational person should have an opinion about a Bucket list.  The Internet opinionator probably equated making lists with doing stuff.  Even my husband Bob, who, to date, has steered clear of the whole bucket meme, admitted it’s a fair point. “Since the clock is ticking,” he said, a to-do list in-a-bucket wasn’t a bad idea – assuming one really wants to do the enumerated...

A Neophyte's Entry into the Soul of Buenos Aires, by Joan Gately Shapiro

In the great karmic unwrapping of the 3rd stage of my life, my daughter gave me the gift of the Tango.  She, my first born, who had ushered in family life,  parenthood and sheer panic, was clearly creating her own separate  life.  In her third year of law school she had decided to study Spanish intensively in Buenos Aires, Argentina.  She and a friend were renting an apartment for the month of January in a trendy section of the city called Palermo Hollywood. 

When she first floated the idea of my joining her in Buenos Aires to learn Spanish, I recoiled at the prospect.  Lugging books and notes, memorizing...

The Discreet Pleasures of the Male Female Friendship

I never looked to my father for advice about women when I was growing up. And I certainly didn’t after I left for college and my siblings described how our mother chased him around with a paring knife when she learned about his little fling with his secretary and he packed up and left. As an enthusiastic English major and lacking any advice to the contrary, I still held out hope for transcendence—what D. H. Lawrence called the “star equilibrium,” the perfect balance in the relationship between a man and a woman. 

And I suppose I’ve found it in a marriage that is now over 40 years old and is as comfortable as a...

Director Jack B. Kahuna recounts an awesome game of Hockey played with guys half his age
Play hockey when you're way over 50? A moment of glory can be yours if you just keep playin'.
Pat Hitchens examines the trend of Boomerang Grads

This month American college seniors will collectively sit through more than 2,000 commencement addresses.    Per tradition, speakers will paint bright pictures of the world the young will inherit, urging them to hang onto their love-of-learning, to think outside-the-box, and be brave in the face of all that will be strange and new.   

As it turns out, however, while things may indeed be strange, not all things will be new. Despite 2013’s slightly rosier hiring forecast, the majority of this year’s fresh faces will not vault directly from dorm to career.   And...

Initiated Shaman and Teacher Marti Spiegelman discusses the primacy to modern civilization of some time-honored principles of Consciousness.
A roomful of Futures and Forex traders? Rather unexpected place to meet a Shaman, but there was Marti Spiegelman speaking about how to apply ancient principles of human consciousness to trading.
The phantasmagorical nature of Alzheimer's and, hence, identity

How many times can you lose your mother? This phrase repeats itself in my head.  It is not a metaphorical question. My mother has had Alzheimer's for almost 15 years.  

My own journey alongside her illness has led me through strange territory.  Mostly unguided, mostly alone.  The one phrase I encountered in my occasional inquiry into the nature of the disease still resonates - that for those closest to the individual, there is a phenomenon which is akin to a succession of little deaths and, for each one, an attendant period of mourning.

I came into this world a guppy...

I can define myself any number of ways, but always, at the core of it all - I am a swimmer. I began this life as a guppy in my mother’s womb, a star child in a universe of living liquid - and I have a bone deep urge to reclaim my former paradise.

When I have bad dreams, they are most often about anticipating and preparing to swim but then finding myself before an empty pool.  Or a half-filled one.  Or a polluted one.  Or one that an absurd array of circumstances prevents me from diving into.  These are very bad dreams.

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